AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF A SPIRITUALLY ENLIGHTENED MASTER
Edward James Tagg
Commonly called Spiritual Enlightenment;
Accurately termed “Nirvikalpa Samadhi”
My spiritual experience is termed Nirvikalpa Samadhi, with a Kundalini Release. Looking back, I now realize that my whole life has been a set up for this.
My mother had thirteen miscarriages prior to my birth, and so, I was the first experimental Cervical Stitch birth. And, prior to my birth, a gypsy woman knocked on the door, on a rainy night, and my mother answered, to find that she was selling clothes pegs, whereupon the gypsy woman gave my mother a quick reading saying that she would have a miracle birth, and that the family would travel as far away from England
Sadly, (but karmically appropriate) my family split up when I was five, and I went to live in an abusive foster home from 5 to 11yrs. However, in later life, I sought out to find answers to my life with psychotherapy and study towards the sciences, namely Human Biology, Psychology, and Philosophy. These didn’t bring about any enlightening answers, and in the process of giving up my search, something profound happened.
As it is commonly understood, when a student gives up his search, and finds the whole world lacking any meaning, enlightenment sometimes follows, and this is what precisely happened to me… Because, I found that some high level scientists, (Sheldrake, Bohm, Bohr, & R.D. Lang) went to India
From my scientific studies, I discovered that human potential seemed to have an infinite open-ended predisposition for growth. I learned this from my inspiration from one of my mentors: John Rowan, chairman of the Association of Humanistic Psychology. He felt inspired by the 3 H’s: Hegel, Huserl, and Heidigger, and Sartre’s influence on phenomenology and epistemology. All this research suggested that it is more worthy to study human health and potential than to study dysfunction.
During this time, when my philosophy classes ended, feeling a little frustrated, I gave up my search for answers in the following way: I went for a walk in the park, at night, and spoke out aloud to ….. and I said something like… “God – I am frustrated and angry with you, because you don’t exist, and because you don’t exist, this world has no meaning or answers, and if you existed, then the world would have meaning, but you don’t, so it doesn’t–What a pity”. This may sound funny, but it had a purpose and a process. The purpose was to open the door a little to the infinite nature of letting go, and this is precisely what happened.
Because, feeling frustrated, I was willing to let go, and to let go particularly of western mindsets that limit, confine and enclose; and so, some part of me became free to become open. In a sense, everything else that is unnamed became possible, or an open agenda, very much like Carlos Castenedas “Nagal” being available after the “Tonal” had been exhausted.
I spent a whole day just musing with my mind on open ended possibilities, and a day time fantasy emerged out of this. I didn’t work that day, and made myself a cup of tea and sat in my favourite armchair and my mind opened to a new thought. My daydream went like this…
I imagined that I had reached a plateau in my human development, and I was bumping my head on an invisible glass ceiling ready to climb another rung of the ladder that I couldn’t yet see. Living in England
I saw, in my mind that because I had reached my full potential and because I could no longer go any higher on my own without outside assistance, that I heard a knock on my door and went to answer it to find and man and a woman dressed in civil service business suits wanting to come in to talk with me specifically. I ushered them in and they sat there with me (this is still part of my day dream). They told me that they were here to congratulate me on my achievements, that I had reached the full height of my understanding that science could not, at present, help me reach my potential and that I felt that there was something more? They said that they were from a secret organization, and they were here to invite me to train with them in the secret arts of the transcendental sciences of the mind and beyond.
Needless to say, my daydream ended but after my cup of tea, I couldn’t rest and sensed that although it was completely a day dream, the concept left me feeling that I was between two worlds, where I could now never go back to the old way of viewing the world. As you might be guessing, something followed this more profound than anyone could ever imagine, and not as a daydream, for that matter.
I was then working for Arthur Anderson (a London Accounting Firm) temporarily, and a work colleague loaned me a book about Sai Baba which mentioned “Kundalini” which made no sense to me, at the time. I was also in a ballet school performance of “The Water Babies”, and the teacher’s partner gave me a lift home, and because he was a yoga teacher, most casually mentioned that he taught “Kundalini Meditation” and there was that word again. The following morning a leaflet came through the mail box advertising Kundalini Meditation classes at “Osho’s” (Bagwan Rajneesh), in Northern London, and so, there was that word for a third time.
Of course, being a very skeptical, scientifically minded person, I was dumbfounded by the statistical unlikelihood of such a triple synchronicity of events, and so all day felt heavily compelled (as if this was some sort of a sign) to attend Osho’s kundalini meditation class in North London June 1997. After a complex process, during the last phase, I “saw” smoke coiling up my spine, which then exited out my spine and looked back at me and became a snake. Then, surrounded by a brick wall, I saw a small disc of light in my heart, and the light traveled out and destroyed the brick wall, and I traveled into the ray of light and connected with every particle in the universe. There followed other images of a pyramid descending over my solar plexus, and another ascending from below to unite to complete a dual pyramidal structure.
When I went home on the London
The following morning, whilst listening to Bjork’s “Homogenic”, I noticed that all the pieces of paper on my bedroom floor were pointing for me to look out the window, whereupon I looked outside and a church steeple made me look up to the clouds, whereupon I fell to my knees with intense energy in my head, and bliss, with a rush like a thousand volcanoes surging up my spine and culminating in my head so intense that I couldn’t stand.
Voices in my head immediately told me to count books on a shelf and look at specific page numbers, and angels started communicating with me through car number plate numbers, street signs, books, music–everything became alive with supreme intelligence, and my ability to see intelligent communication increase a million fold, where I became the information, and knowing as the truth of everything itself. These signs would come in packages of about ten or twenty, one or two seconds apart. The intelligence required to interpret them was immense, but effortless.
I would have bursts of energy lasting about 5-10 seconds which would occur roughly 25 times a day: it’s like a million volcanoes exploding in my head, where I had to fall to my knees, and wondered if my atoms would vibrate to a point where, any moment, I would physically disappear into thin air and merge into nothingness–extremely intense! The rush of excitement can not be adequately explained, because it was too mystical, and not of this world. It was like I no longer existed in this dimension, but somewhere else completely. My body was walking about but I wasn’t home in my body: a spirit being of unbelievable strength: 100 foot tall, bullet proof, invincible, full of infinite love and awareness of the whole, and completely without fear resided within and all about me–nothing else was present, certainly not fear or limitation in any way whatsoever.
The Samadhi feeling that remained was that I (Edward ) stopped existing and only God was present, and I had a love for everything, and was the love itself, where I felt very light and easy like I was walking one inch off the ground, and many physical activities would feel blissful, like turning a key in a door, and walking down the road, an angel’s voice would make me aware of my “timeline” meaning that every microsecond of my life could be felt intuitively known as perfection and effortless being, that walking a certain speed would bring me multiple synchronicities of meaning from signs in shop windows, music, car number plates, and feelings, etc.
I felt no prejudice towards passengers on the train, and saw tremendous beauty in the lock of someone’s hair, and would cry at everything in joy all the time, or dance around my garden like a drunk lunatic, and playing with insects. I stared at a hyacinth flower, and then entered into the cell walls of the flower and was the flower “itself”–as God. Nothing I looked at was external to me or had any existence, and I lived only in the energy as God hidden behind all objects, and just swayed, danced and merged in the non-duality of tremendous intelligence. I had all the intelligence of the entire energy behind the universe, and had all the answers, but sort not to dwell on any specific piece of knowledge, and just rested in the love knowing that love was complete and full, and all that mattered.
I sold or gave away most of my personal belongings, and saw pain on peoples faces in the streets, but saw also the beauty of perfection of the karmic dance of everything in the world, like God waving a conductor’s baton at a symphony, and could see everyone’s part to play in the dance, and reveled in that joy.
I lost all desire for food, sex, sleep, or possessions, and had to come out of the experience, because I might forget to be in the world: the perfect state enabled me to experience another dimension of awareness, where it was all a dance or blissful game, like a playful joke, but with loving meaning too, because I was God as the dance experiencing the eternal moment. Time ceased and I got lost in each moment as God/me existed beyond time just “as”–physical distance got lost, and the trees felt like they were touching my retina and objects in a landscape appeared illusory like shadows. The love exploded everyday in my heart expanding bursting out of my ribcage, and I continued to feel expansive, taking up all space, invincible, not knowing fear, and aware of every microsecond in totality behind history in each moment.
I was woken up at 3:33:33am and told by a voice to get out of bed and watch channel 3, and saw a news item suggesting that I go to Los Angeles to meet my wife, and then at 7:33:33am, was told to go turn on the TV and saw the same news item about Venice Beach California, and getting a green card to meet a wife. I showered and asked when, and the voice said look at the printed numbers on the showerhead which said 26, and she said go to USA 26 July 1997 .
Within 6 weeks I was in Los Angeles
Previously, on a bus, a voice said in 15 seconds I will give you a sign if you look out of the left window, and there was a huge painting of Mother Mary, followed by a voice with ten second count-down for another sign displaying a “check” sign on a gas station. This voice did this process five times on that bus journey. The next day, the voice took me into a shop with a painting of Mother Mary over a sign saying “my first lady” and the voice spoke and said that she was my angel and to go to a book store and counting from the left showed me a book with a picture of a woodcarving design for my work, and has spent the last thirteen years giving me precise instructions in this manner.
I went to the Spiritualist Association of Great Britain and a psychic said that I might be visited by aliens. I then joined Jennifer McKensie’s psychic development circle.
As the Samadhi subsided after 10 days, the communication and “signs” from spirit beings still continued at about one per second, all day, every day. Some were from angels, but I got tired and overwhelmed, and the dark side sent messages too, and I had to walk around cities with both hands clasped over my solar plexus to protect me from psychic attack. This increased dramatically, where voices and messages where overtaking me, and then one night, in bed I saw dark shadows at the foot of my bed and a shadow in my open doorway. I became paralyzed and went into a deep sleep, and awoke the next morning with blood trickling down my nose. I went to the bathroom and a huge blood clot came out of my nose. Years later channeled writings confirmed that I had an implant from reptilian aliens and I agreed to it so I could gain intense training in discernment, which is what has happened. My greatest skill is being aware of all types of spiritual messages from other realms, so if I remained in enlightenment, I would not be an expert in psychic discernment from my many years of being tested – angels say that they test me daily. I can now get back to full awareness with no fear of confusion about anything in any other realm.
I’ve learned that all these skills are valuable because I can now communicate very clearly with angels and act as their scribe and representative so I can help people with their suffering. Angels wish to have strong relationships with us because they are our advisors and need workers here on earth. If I ignored this on my path to enlightenment, I would not be able to pass on angel wisdom to others.
Some teachings suggest that it is impossible to remain in nirvikalpa samadhi for 21 days, because the person will then physically merge into the absolute, and will no longer remain in human existence. Upon reflection, I am glad that I did not remain in nirvikalpa Samadhi, because I have cleared my my emotional pain from being abandoned in a foster home and being abused which was tremendously valuable because now I have incredible wisdom to pass on to those in suffering. Being in the world helps me gain understanding and insight that I might not get sitting in a monastery.
That said, all my healing is complete and now my angels want me to get back into enlightenment. And to that end, they have taught me highly advanced enlightenment exercises of meditation, contemplation and prayer that I have not discovered elsewhere.
So, more recently, Mother Mary has been training me in self-mastery and considers advanced inner child recovery to be one of the most necessary ways to achieve inner completion and contentment.
And, therefore, I now make myself available to clients, in need of assistance, on the path to healing and ascension. Ascension teachings, Mary tells me, are not fully understood, and need more clarification. And, as the angels are very concerned, the world is in much disruption and change, and so, many people will need powerful help in the near future, when the planet goes through some upheaval, as is clearly being see already: scientifically, economically, socially, and environmentally.
Mother Mary’s teachings and healings are always available and are certainly not at all fluffy and full of empty comfort, as some might expect. Her training is advanced but reaches all levels of need, providing peace, comfort and calm, and at times, where necessary, cathartic, painful and dramatic, with an unexpected burst into a powerful new awareness of inner realm.
Edward James Tagg +64226583373 edwardtagg@yahoo.com
